Tong-its, atbp.

Tong-Its, et al.

We play Tong-its almost every night. This Filipino poker-like game has been one my few addictions ever since my early teens. The first time I learned it was during one Christmas vacation when I have all the money to bet against my Mom and my brother, Jason, just to learn how to double your money if you are lucky. I would sing at night (not as a professional singer, but a caroler) and I will play in the morning, just before lunchtime. On the very first day I played – believe it or not, I won 18 pesos – 90% of my total capital (20 pesos – just in case you feel lazy to compute).  The second day, I still won. On the third day, after thinking that at long last, I had found something I would be proud of not losing ever,  I lost – and it had been that way until I learned something very, very, very important in life – don’t always count on luck.

I actually won this round, can you believe that?

(From L-R) Jonathan, ME, Marlon, Rowel

Isang araw nitong 2010, napag-tripan namin ni kuya na mag-Poker. Actually, I really didn’t know how to play it. The last time I played (back in 2007 in Iraq), I was having more trouble trying to hide my ignorance of the game than winning. Well I lost there small time – about 40 to 60 bucks. That time with kuya, I thought I was going to learn and would be at ease and won’t have to exert effort of faking a good hand (though I really don’t know if I DO have a good hand). But I was wrong. Learning the game cost me 300 bucks (can you believe that?). But my kuya was good to his younger brother and understood that his younger was just learning the game. He gave his younger brother $100 back and pinangalat sa buong opisina namin ang aking pagkatalo... Lesson learned: Never gamble against your brother.

So, I gambled against my ‘other’ officemates, bosses included. On the second time I played, I won $20. Third night – our country manager lost his 100 bucks to me, along with 50 bucks more from the others.  Fourth night I played, still won more than a hundred. This time, I already regained what I lost to my brother. On our succeeding games, I still won some more, until one night, for the first second time since I learned Poker by heart, I lost $20. Then I stopped

I stopped because I thought that my winning streak has come to an end and that it was a signal that a series of unfortunate events (meaning, mga gabing talunan) has commenced and that I will just find myself addicted to the game because I will always aim to regain what I lost the previous night. And you know how I did it? Simple, I just made an accounting of my “Poker” transactions ever since that battle against my kuya:

Beginning Balance:                                     $0

Add: Revenues from Poker

Day 1 (Donation Revenue)          $100

Day 2                                       $20

Day 3                                       $150

Day 4                                       $130

Day 5                                       $80

Day 6                                       $110                             $590

Less: Losses from Poker

Day 1 /with Kuya                      $300

Day 7                                       $20                             ($320)

Ending Balance:                                       $270

So in 1 week, I was able to make $270.00 out of Poker. On Friday, I went to Eggers PX (a military exchange store in Kabul) and bought a brand new X-Box 360 120gb with Kinect Sensors. Nice gaming console and at a good price too. $299.00 – just added 29 bucks to my winnings.

Well, I thought that from zero balance to $270 is not bad. Also, if I already thought I was gonna lose more, then I’m ought to lose more. So I decided to stop $270. But this thinking wasn’t the one that stopped me from playing poker.

It was a freaking X-Box videogame that got me really hooked enough to forget Poker and guess what - shower. Yes, even taking a shower gets compromised with my addictions. There’s only one addiction that motivates me to spend more time in the shower room – and that is my addiction to my girlfriend.

Pero since all videogames ay may katapusan (kung hindi man nakakasawa), nawala rin ang addiction ko sa mga ito. Natapos ko ang Naruto Shippuden pati na rin ang Assasins Creed – ay mali, nagsawa lng pala ako sa Assassin’s Creed – so sa Naruto lang pala talaga ako na-adik. Kaso, tinapos na namin ni Kuya yung storymode, eh sawa na sya mag laro ng 2 player versus, tapos si Ricky naman (yung isa naming kasama sa work) eh hindi naman ganon ka husay (walang challenge), hindi na rin ako naglaro. Nawala din ang addiction ko.

Almost all addictions leave our bodies, our minds, our hearts at a certain point in time. It may be when we don’t find happiness in them any longer, or when we no longer find reasons to do them. That’s why I believe, that it is utterly important to choose our addictions well – for sometimes they leave indelible marks on our personalities that make us regret for the rest of our lives. Some addictions just destroy us, take away our dreams, and lead us to our fall. Others would create us and bring us to the realization of our dreams. Discernment and discipline are the keys. I have always remembered that the worst addiction makes us feel good of ourselves, so good that we no longer feel that we are already crashing on hard ground.

Now, I am back to playing tong-its. And I have new playmates! Now that my brother was stranded in the PI for a long time, I get to play with new people in Project Controls department. I’ve known them for years and have been friends or acquaintances. It was good playing Tong-its with them. But unlike before, where I think of gambling as a way to quickly double your money, I think of it as a past time. With good friends playing with me, I always enjoy even if I lose. I don’t do accounting equation anymore, I just enjoy the company. When you have Rowel, Jonathan and Marlon playing with you, you’ll just laugh big time.

No dull moment in a Tong-its Night...

Playing Tong its with my Girlfriend's family

I was losing here.. at first

Kailangan na nilang magtulong kasi nauubos ko na ang pera nila bwahahahah...

Tong-its will be one of those addictions that will come and go. And I would even say that I am not addicted to it right now. I am addicted to the good company I have with friends and do hope that this addiction never ends – just as my addiction to God, to my girlfriend and to my family will never be suppressed. 

The Xbox 360 Degree Turn on Reality versus Mario Brothers

April 8, 1993

I’ve never been a fan of video games. The last one I’ve had much delight of was way back the Nintendo Family Computer times. Finishing Super Mario (or just Mario, so to speak) 3 times in 2 hours was my record, and I was very proud of it. So I went out to a computer shop in our subdivision to challenge anyone who thought he or she was good. You know back then, there are no internet cafes yet; just some random houses with 5 televisions (sometimes black and white) and 5 family computer units renting them out at 3 pesos an hour. So there I was, bragging about my Guiness Record of My Own Mind only to find out that somebody achieved the same feat – in 48 minutes! I was in disbelief upon learning such and even thought that the kid who beat me was just getting help from some unknown up-down-left-right-a-b-select-start cheat codes that made him jump to the final stage quickly. But he didn’t. I watched him played, he went through the same stages as I did, jumped on the same spots as I did, and made Mario leaped to each stage flagpole with the same grace as I did. I was devastated.

            

            I was a loser.

I was nine years old at that time and that made it worse because my nemesis (never bothered to know his name) was just six. And the worst of all, every possum nut there beat my time – except a girl who played “Ice Climber”. I went home, not telling anyone about it and feeling sorry for my 3 pesos that I thought would put me on our village map.

                March 20, 2011

                18 years after and here I found myself packing my things as I am going on R&R pretty soon. I just remember that heartbreaking day as I am putting back into its box this X-Box 360 that I just bought 3 weeks ago. Far different from those Family Computers whose joystick buttons I’ve raped non-stop, this machine impresses me so much. With internet capability, Kinect Motion Sensor gadget, High Definition graphics, and kick-ass controls, this is obviously a gazillion of miles ahead of that crappy Nintendo. Get this - I can even store up to a hundred games on this machine’s 250 gig hard drive! 

            Kewl!

Well I still suck in video games (was even wondering why I even bought it), but this Xbox made me think how much had changed since then. Well, I am not really that techie and have never been a fan of just-came-out gadgets, but I can appreciate how these contraptions evolved from their ancestors. And change is becoming a big issue to me lately, with lots of life-changing events happening in rapid succession and I can hardly keep up with all of them.  A friend once told me that the only thing constant in this world is change and as much as I would want to debate on that, I am starting to believe in it fully, with no exceptions nor conditions.

               

                I’m even changing how I view things! (It must be true then)

My youngest brother who’s still in college may really be excited to play with this new machine. I also think my nephew and nieces would spend more time in my house marveling on the dozens of Naruto characters they can choose from to “digitally” murder each other. And somehow I recall those times when I was the one sitting there in front of the TV, trying to practice on how I can beat my big brother Jason in battle games. Time had passed and you can’t help but wonder how when you were a kid, you never thought you’ll become an adult someday. I never thought that that control I once got using the steel plated joysticks will turn into control over kids I would stop from playing so they can finish their homework. That power I had in my hands to make Mario jump on turtles and toss them will become power to make another person become a friend or an enemy. Before, I was controlling Battle City tanks; now I am controlling my life.

        

        It’s a 360 degree turn indeed, and life had been a lot harder since then. This time, there are no cheat codes – you have to go through each stage and fight each opponent - be it a person who’d knock you down, a loss in business, a failed exam, or an ailing relationship.  And they’re always a tough battle. The main problem is, you only have one life you can use, and when you get hurt one time, it stops you and takes a while before you can get another mushroom or flower that’ll make you grow and have the power to stand a chance.

               

                 In video games, there are items we get that make our favorite characters a lot stronger, faster, or invincible. A star makes Mario look like a walking disco ball. A big pellet enables Pacman to freeze the multi-colored ghosts. These items are also present in real life – I call them opportunities. However, they don’t make things easy just like that. Instead, we work them out. And some of them don’t even appear as opportunities. Instead, they seem to us as challenges only to find out that they are blessings-in-disguise in the end.  And I think it makes life a little tougher, because not only you have opponents to fight with, you also got opportunities to work out. And, if you don’t grab these opportunities, you may never defeat your opponents ever. Golden rule: Pinaghihiirapan ang lahat!

                

                 Sh%t!

                

             And this is the reason why I find a lot of under-achieving students, out of school youths, even unemployed adults so hooked up to internet games (they even throw up their last penny just so they can build their kingdom for an hour or two). In the virtual world, they can be who they want to be, create the monster they want to appear, and kill their opponents with magical weapons and potions. And I will not blame why they would spend a lot of their time in front of those monitors, enduring the summer heat and sharing each other’s profanities and odors. – they want to live in the virtual world. I, myself, would always like to do the same - pretend I’m someone that can do whatever my mind wants to do in a very easy fashion.

                

                 But life, as we know it, will never be easy. And it really makes me ugghh!

                

               It's just different. But no matter how hard it is, I’d rather build my adventures and imagination on it than on a memory card. I’ve learned that computer games will only appear as real as how we think they are. 

               Also, I would always prefer the playing field of real life over the other: for in life, no matter what you do, no matter how you failed, no matter how you lost - there are no game-overs.

Unless you’re already six feet under.

But until you’re not, you have no right to give up.

I love the Lord!

Champ

P.S.

Some things never changed. For example, Jason still beats me in this computer crap big time. The difference, however, is that I lose at least 10 dollars every time (greediest bas*ard ever!)

Sidenote:

I'm excited because my girlfriend and I are going home this summer, and I'm even more excited because...

On my next Bora picture, I am not going to be alone.

And congratulations to my friend Jose Admiran Fabregas II for having been recently baptized into the Facebook world!

Getting Older in Afghanistan

It's 4:30 am and since the entire camp is still quite, I decided not to let this chance of revisiting and updating my blog pass by. Thanks to my toothache, woke up at 3:30 which is very UNUSUAL for me.

It's snowing outside and has been for the last three days. There was a brief moment of sunshine yesterday afternoon and the snow-capped mountains that borded Kabul on the north surprised me like an apparition. May maganda rin pala dito,I thought. Konting picture-picture, then it became dark again, and just as I expected, it rained.. then snowed.

I hate winters... I hate the biting cold... and the thing I hate most - waking up with my A/C unit showing 'ERROR', when it's supposed to show 30 Celsius as how I set it up before I slept. Now, I'm freezing my ass off. Mabuti na lang, I borrowed this unit heater from my next room officemate - Ricky - who seem to have no problem with his A/C unit at all.

Well, you've just heard my rants about where I am right now. Most of the time I never complain, save for some assholes in the company I work with. But the climate here takes the sanity out of me - First, malamig. Second, walang katabi sa kama na mag-shashare sana ng init. Third, o baka tumatanda lang ako. If only my honey is here with me, these would never even occur to me. She'll give me warmth and comfort and will let me feel the vigor of my youth (see, in this cold, I'm becoming corny). But she's not here, so I often resort to going to the place I know is surely warm - in my mind - because there she will always be present (cornier, if there's a term as such!).

But since she'll always be there and never leave, I will brave going out on the cold to write. Talking about age a while ago, I am proud and very honored to divulge that I just celebrated my 2?th birthday here in Aghanistan. Looking back, it's funny because for the last 4 years of my life, I've been celebrating my birthdays in war-torn countries. That's probably the reason why my hairline receedes so fast; my body ages twice than the actual number of yeas adding up to my length of existence. This is a major major problem, but since I don't complain, except for assholes and cold winters (I know, I'm redundant), I won't bother delving into it.

Instead, I will count my blessings. I will thank God for the wonderful things he gave me during the last year that I consider birthday gifts.

1. For giving me another year, another shot at life to make things (if not the world) better. I've always believed that everybody exists in the world for a reason. If you're an agnostic, you might believe in the theory of universal conspiracy (I've watch this from a movie somewhere), which is practically the same. 

2. For giving me a violent, crazy, but, wonderful family, whom I drew my strength from and who've always been supportive of me (and of their monthly allowance, ha ha).

3. As the best birthday gift, for my Mahal, who never hesitated to join me venture into the weary and uncertain world of long-distance relationship (as long as I call on Skype, and has prepaid minutes to it)

4. For Skype, for enabling me to be in contact with them everyday.

5. For Skype, for helping in my panliligaw (along with my three months of di mabilang na pagpupuyat)

6. For my job, that enables me to buy minutes for Skype and for cellphone load.

7. For letting me go to Sagada - twice! One of my dreams-came-true.

8. For letting me celebrate Christmas and New Year in the Philippines (at last after three years)

9. For my friends, who've always been concerened of how I am (while gulping beer; amazing how they do that!)

10. For my business partners, for their patience with our employees.

11. For our employees, for their patience with Madam Cyla.

12. For the chance to meet my SDT batchmates again.

13. For making me part of Sto. Nino Choir's first concert as the man behind the voice over.

14. For Facebook... Geez, I've never had so many people greeting me in my birthday - ALL MY LIFE!

15. For Facebook... where I had my first glimpse of her..

16. For Facebook again .. where she had the first glimpse of me.

17. For Burj Khalifa, Atlantis, and Dubai Mall, or collectively known as the BAD sites, for witnessing (and subsequently proving) that I really am a sweet person.

18. For my house (that I can rent out as a motel)

19. For my credit card.. for making my family happy even if it makes me sobby.

20. For my mother, who implemented the house interior designs I had on my mind (which I gathered from the internet LOL)

21. For my hipag, for catching the carpenter sitting pretty in my room, resting and enjoying the cool breeze of my AC. She cut off my electric bill into half (now only 2k even if I am not there)

22. For Cebu Pacific, for flying me to Hongkong without crashing, even if I cursed it so many times now (I won't lay down the details because I'm thanking and not complaining)

23. For my bestfriends, though we are thousand of miles apart, we still think of the same things. (he, he)

24. For my guides and friends in Sagada, for setting up the tent, keeping us good company and spilling corny lines... LOL

25. For this blog, that enables me to share my random thoughts, my joys and sorrows, and broadcast how good the Almighty, have been to me - All the time.

26. For my brother Kuya Jason - for balancing out all the positive in my life by being a prick at walang humpay na pambwibwisit sa akin.

27. For letting me live 27 years... and counting.


For all who greeted me.. maraming salamat! To God Be The Glory! Amen.

P.S.

I have a new number: Globe: 09274719025
I lost my old one.

Picture! Picture!

Atlantis Dubai with Honey

Concert of Sto. Nino Choir



At home with Gureta



Oration ng tropa sa Sagada.. LOL



Family at Sagada (Bomod-ok Waterfalls)

Shane. Exie, and RJ in Sumaguing Cave



The Family at Baguio - Christmas Day




My Parents in Sagada




Ha ha ha



Simbang Gabi



Bonfire Fest with all the pretty girls (naks!)




Burj Khalifa Dubai with Honey



Concert of the Choir

Hanapin nyo ko...



Singing for my cousin's wedding



Hongkong - Lantau Is.



With Workmates in Afghanistan ( Ricky, Me, Mavis, Aladin, and Ronnie)




Konting Salu-salo

 

Overseas.. again

I'm overseas again, and I'm glad I made it through my 6th bid to get out of the country... It's like I'm out of prison, after bribing the warden LOL...

I will be posting blog entries again soon, with the following topics...

1. What Php40,000 worth of skype credits gets?
2. Getting on top of the world - literally and figuratively.
3. Sagada - na naman?
4. Christmas and New Year in the Philippines - Magastos!!!
5. Baby Gureta
6. 6K is equivalent to 6 'Karma'
7. Back on the Game

But for now, have to work for my company have missed me a lot... The difference is, sermon ang dadatnan ko and hindi warm welcome .. LOL

Stress, Desert, and US of A

I wonder whether there's a gauge available in the market that'll show if one person's stressed out or not. If there is, I'm pretty sure the inventor had been stressed damn well in his life. Sometimes, we'll only know that we are in a certain condition only when we don't feel anything else but it. Well, it took me more than a week to realize that I've been sleeping hardly 4 hours a day, haven't been eating meals at the right time, haven't watched any news for 3 days now, and haven't taken a shower for two days (I'm putting the emphasis on 'stress' and not on my hygiene, ok?). And things get really, really worse when it's already worse, you get what I mean?

And right now, I'm in that situation. Difficult thing about it is, options are scarce when these things happen, and you have to weigh in your priorities so you can decide whether to tread the hard, stressful path or just say screw it then go home.

Most of the time I'm overseas have been very easy for me. I earn, help my family, and build my future. But as they say, one can't have the best of both worlds. I get more than a dozen times the salary I was earning before in Makati, yet I'm losing that one thing no one can ever recover once lost - time. 

4 years and counting. Looking back (I usually do this when I'm stressed-out), I began asking my self. What have I gotten so far? Grey hair? 40 pounds? Irremovable eyebags? These are petty, simple things in exchange for quite a comfortable living (not luxurious). But then I start thinking deeper and ponder on things I have lost so far... love life, beer sessions, and the worst of all - 2 inches of hair line!

One thing for sure, I'm trying to regain the first one, and I'm at it whole-heartedly. I am not too late, am I? In fact, I don't think I am too late for anything (but who knows). I'm so damn young but sometimes I feel so old. Probably what I get for working with people who are a lot older than me, and about half of them can already be my dad or grandfather. 

Last night, somebody from US, apparently tired from reviewing my work over and over again, told me on his email that he's losing his patience on me, as if I were a kid. It irritated me and I responded with a one-liner rebuttal -

"Don't take this personally buddy, it's just fucking work"

He answered (as if it was my fault that these revisions came up when it is clearer than an electric microscope that it was his boss' request to do the changes):

"Well I don't have the time to review your work once, much less twice, thrice, four times!"

I answered:

"I apologize if your work calls you to review reports once, twice, thrice or even a hundred times. I feel sorry for you pal"

You know how old that person is? 50. (Twice my age, though I know you won't believe me).

Anyway, I did not set this blog up to absorb my rants about my work, nor my complaints in life. I just mentioned it here because it helped me realize one thing - you can grow old, and let each second that pass in your life consume you, but never grow up. Growing up doesn't mean adding up years on your life. It doesn't mean losing hair either. Growing up is learning while you lose time. Growing up is making your life bigger in order to accommodate not only your self but others. Growing up is making sure that when you face our good Lord, you have wise words to say on your mouth and not lollipop. Oh, did I say that in literature, lollipop is sometimes regarded as a metaphor of immaturity? 

I strongly believe that people reach maturity only when they start being on their own. Loneliness helps us yearn for affiliation, thus making us emotionally 'wider' to let other people in. However our world right now is too complex that being alone is hardly a possibility. Just like that person, who was working for our company for God knows how long, and he's been surrounded by praises, night outs, sycophantic colleagues, competition, and probably threats of being overshadowed. That's the world for him right now and in order to survive, he's got to prove himself to the people around him. Funny, because he was so used to doing it that he even did that to me, a bloke silently working 18 hours a day in a burrow somewhere in the deserts of Afghanistan. 

You know what's worse? There's a lot of people like him that I work with. Most of them are in the US right now. Gee, I'm starting to see USA as the United States of Assholes when spelled-out. 

So what advantage do these people, in suits and are driving pretty cars, have over us, rugged mercenaries thriving in this desert? Well, first they've got time to spend with their families and friends, make out with their girlfriends, enjoy a can of beer every night while watching their favorite NFL team on TV, and plan for  out of town trips on weekends. What advantage do I and people like me have over these people then? Well, we have 'wider' emotional space and we allow more people in our lives rather than overtake them. The fact that we are here enduring, the loneliness and the dust in the air, proves that we are putting others (like families and loved ones) before our selves. 

But you see, my statement cannot be generalized, nor be even proven as a theory or a scientific law of mankind, otherwise, I would be winning the Nobel Prize every year. First I'm referring to people in US of A (you should now by now what that means). Second, I'm venting out my stress over my work, being far from my family, being far from my love (she's about three hour plane ride away), being far from my business, being far from my friends, and just the thought of being far. I'm just beginning to feel the tiring predicament of just carrying on with work, no matter what I lose, whether it's time, affiliation, confidence, self-esteem, or even "normality".

Or maybe, I'm just getting tired of growing up and that I am needing for a break. 

You see before, when I'm tired, I just don't give a flying f*ck about most things. But I think I have become different. Now, it is when I am tired or stressed out that I over-think about so many things. It drains me further but I can't help it. In my brain, there's this battle between working things out just for my sake only and planning ahead for the sake of others. It's a never ending surge and ebb of advantages and disadvantages, but at the end of the day, the chaos subsides and I just continue pushing. Just like a real mercenary.

But, just as everything in this world is, there's a time for everything. There's even a time for giving up and heading for a change.

Before I go, I leave this simple prayer.

"Lord, all things good happen in your perfect time. Help me prepare myself so that I may become worthy of your grace when that time comes."

Advance Merry Christmas everyone! champ110310

for R.P.

P.S.

Talking about 4 years overseas, here's something for you to look at.

Evolution of the hairline

2007

2008

2009

2010